Having experienced an early, rampant flu season with the virulent strain of the H1N1 Flu, our germ defense awareness is growing exponentially. Traditional social interactions are being adapted or refused in efforts to contain exposure to germs. How are we to navigate the road between civility and the protection of our wellbeing? With courtesy and savvy.
 
Watch For New Precedents
“Bumping knuckles or pats on the back are newer forms of greeting, especially among the younger college-aged group. Although these unconventional handshake substitutes are gaining popularity, classic handshakes are more appropriate among business associates and older generations.

This fall, the “elbow” and “hiney” bumps were suggested by national media celebrities as tongue-in-cheek, germ-safe greeting replacements for hugs and kisses. Manners maven Anna Post, spokesperson for the Emily Post Institute, suggests negotiating an unwanted hug by putting your hands on the tops or sides of the shoulders of the hugging person, instead of wrapping them around the hugger’s back.

Expect the possibility of people rejecting your handshake because of germ phobia. Should someone refuse to shake your outstretched hand, withdraw your hand as gracefully as you can and progress with your conversation without being offended.

In this age of hand wipes and portable sanitizers, de-germing surfaces in public spaces is becoming a common practice. Grocers offer sanitizing wipes for cart handles, while increasing numbers of stores, restaurants and churches display bottles of hand sanitizer for interested consumers. At some health clubs, members use sanitizing wipes on workout machines before exercising. Using these publicly offered germ-fighting aids is appropriate as long as it is not overtly directed as a defensive measure towards another specific person.

What Can You Do?
When you are ill, stay home if at all possible. In public or at work, be prepared to protect others. Carry tissues and sanitizer. Dispose of used tissues quickly and discreetly. Wash and/or sanitize your hands often when touching anything to be used or touched by others. When approached for a handshake or hug, hold your right palm up, close to your body, offer a brief explanation (i.e.: “Better  not shake today!” or “Germs!”), then quickly move along with your greeting. Direct your attention on the person, rather than on your illness, smile, look them in the eyes and listen.

A sneeze can spread 40,000 droplets released at speeds upwards of 75mph, according to Wikipedia. Cover your sneezes and coughs with tissues and handkerchiefs. When none are available, turn away from people and muffle your coughs and sneezes in the crook of your elbow as you face the floor.

In general, look for ways to limit your exposure to potential germ-exchanging sites. Rather than your fingertips, use your knuckles to push ATM, credit card machine or elevator buttons. Swipe your own credit card when possible. Use your own pen to sign credit slips or fill out information. Carry tissues for your own use and to share with others. Wash or sanitize your hands after shopping, pumping gas, handling money and being in public.

If exposed to a hearty handshake against your wishes, retire to a restroom as discreetly as possible to wash your hands or use sanitizer. (Remember that hand sanitizer can remove color from some fabrics; handle it carefully.)

Move through crowded areas breathing through your nose, rather than your mouth, to utilize your body’s natural filter of nasal cilia. Keep your distance from anyone who is coughing or sneezing.  Wash hands frequently and do not touch your mouth, nose and eyes.

Take care of yourself. Get plenty of sleep. Eat fresh fruits and vegetables, avoiding processed foods. Exercise regularly and laugh every day to strengthen your immune system.

We are living in an age where increasing numbers of people are moving through multiple cultures, exchanging germs at unprecedented rates. In this ripe setting for the spread of pandemic illnesses, social protocol is being rewritten as a necessity. Being polite should not mean putting yourself at risk. As we adjust and adapt, remember that the heart of all good etiquette is to treat others as we would like to be treated.

Sharon Carlton, High Country Courtesies ©2009
Sharon Carlton conducts High Country Courtesies customer service workshops and is Director of High Country Cotillion, a social education program for youth. She writes and speaks on modern etiquette and life skill topics. Contact her at sacarlton@skybest.com